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Posts Tagged ‘english’

As I browsed the market last week in search of the best market shirts as gifts for friends of mine in America, something fascinating happened.

A woman came up to me and asked me to read the shirt she wanted to buy. Specifically, she explained, she liked it and wanted to buy it for her teenage daughter, but she didn’t want it to say anything bad in English.

The shirt was covered entirely in text taken from something about architecture and design at the University of Nottingham. After I skimmed it, I explained it as best I could. Seemed good enough for her. We chatted about how one can find some really good deals on clothes at the market so long as one looks carefully. After she asked me to read a second shirt, we talked a little more about her daughter. I left to go explore another vendor’s offerings before I became the market English consultant or got caught taking photos of only the weirdest clothes.

Like these:

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Yesterday, I passed by an elaborate Taoist funeral in progress just as the coffin was about to be loaded into the hearse. The proceedings blocked off half of the street, including drummers, dancers, and the mourners, dressed in white.

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Police were on hand to direct traffic around the event, but it appears that not all of them were sworn officers. The Chinese characters on this man’s vest translate to “Volunteer Police.”

The English?
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Sweet coffee
bean I will
make a coffee
at the time
you come.

May you be happy.

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Me too!

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Traces of the wind
Silent
I forget how to think
Is your memory

The memory of the wind
All zero
Have piled sweet
It also flies elimination.

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I swear, baguettes have come in this paper sleeve for as long as I can remember.

IF

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The last instruction is my favorite part, I think.

Next conference (activity) I attend, I think I might bring one. I hear it’s a very good idea.

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